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Middle School Yearbook Proves White Kids Have Some Ridiculous Names

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Time to turn off spellcheck. Or, perhaps someone should have turned on the old spell check a few years ago. Either way, this is a chronicle of just how far naming conventions have come. Even traditional names have been given the eccentric or phonetic treatment. And why not? A name is nothing more than a random sound, really, codified by common usage. Most names in English are completely devoid of their original meanings.

That doesn’t make this list any more unusual. These come from Utah, a state steeped in conservative traditions.

Madysen. Aeryn. Taiten. Taycie. Gambit. Aroarin. Braxton. Macady. Maycee. Jaxon. Ryker. Jaxon. Jr. Laycee. Taeton.

If only tweets came with a pronunciation guide.

Jaidyn. Tayson. Maddyson. Bayli. Kaydee. Madyson. Madysen. Rylei. Braelyn. Micaylee. Ashlynn. Braxton. Dezalin. Dreyasin. (The last two are twins.)

Jaxen. Ryen. Paizley. Garyn. Kasidy. Zoie. Maecy. Addisen. Kambri. Cambrie. Trenton. Bayleigh. Avorie. Sydnee. MacLaine.

For those wondering, only one of these names wasn’t flagged by spellcheck. Any guesses?

That’s it for the yearbook, but not for the doubters.

Czarnecki felt compelled to remind readers that this wasn’t a hoax. Yet she wasn’t finished, either. She has a kid in high school….

Parriss. No clue how that one would be pronounced.

Cinch for a cowboy seems appropriate. Perhaps some are hoping to move back to a naming system that reflects an aspect of personality, or a vocation.

Kindree. Kayley. Britlee. Kytie. MaKayla. SHAKOTAH. Madalyn. Eros. Kynnaston. Briley. Makaylee. Kenion. Jacklynne. Evigail. Treydon. Daxton.

The silent X makes this a winner.

Can you call the police on someone for pointing out the obvious?

And there you have it. Those of you who might have been wondering if the stereotypes about Utah would hold true for these names have your answer.

And the trend isn’t new. Check out this clip from the 1991 film “LA Story.”