CALIFORNIA CRAZY: City Asks Criminals to Apply for Police Commission Opening

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The city of Oakland is hoping to reform their policing practices. And in what could only been seen as logic in the state of California, they’re encouraging criminals to apply. The new police commissioners will “oversee the Oakland Police Department to make sure that its policies,practices and customs meet national standards of constitutional policing.”

For those of you who may be a bit confused about what a police commissioner is, I can help. He’s the guy that cuts on the bat signal whenever the criminal element in Gotham City gets the upper-hand on the police, and they need a little support from a guy with anger management issues who dresses in tights.

In some places, the commissioner is a paid position that acts as the chief of police. He or she is the boss. The same term applies to a member of a board given the same level of oversight, and that is what we’re talking about here.

Perhaps saying “criminal” is taking it a bit too far. The position’s advertisement is asking for “formerly incarcerated individuals.” It doesn’t specify why applicants might have been incarcerated. And some of those previously incarcerated have turned their lives around and become productive members of society.

“Commissioners cannot be any of the following: current police officer, current City of Oakland employee, former Oakland police officer, current or former representative of a police officer labor union.”

Looking for an idea of what the job would require? It looks straight forward enough. It will be work, though, so layabout criminals should really think twice about applying.

So if you are looking for a good volunteer gig that would come with a lot of power, this may be it. The position doesn’t pay, but it would look good on a resume. Here’s the link to the application.

This wouldn’t be so unusual if the city of Oakland hadn’t chosen to highlight the part about criminal backgrounds so obviously. It almost looks like they’re inviting those who have a score to settle with the police to come and oversee them. That is clearly how the application’s message is being received publicly.

And you only have to be 18 to apply. What could possibly go wrong? Applications are due by the end of the month, so start cracking.